The Candy Dish

The 5 Types of People in Your Life- The Candy Dish

“Evaluate the people in your life.; then promote, demote, or terminate. You’re the CEO of your life.”  -Tony Gaskins

Throughout my life, I have had both the honor and privilege of meeting some pretty wonderful people, some have come into my life at just the right time to support me during a hard time or to perhaps help me reach a higher level, however some of the people I have encountered, have unfortunately come to teach me painful lessons of how to deal with manipulation, distrust, and betrayal by the hands of someone I called “friend”.  When was the last time you evaluated your circle?  

    I used to believe, that when it came to judging peoples character and intention, I had a great sense of discernment, however, that has proven to not be the case over and over again.  Recently I have had to reevaluate my “semi-circle” of friends and realized that I had people that fell within one or more of the following 5 categories:

    The Suckers, these are the very toxic people in our lives, they only purpose they serve is to intentionally drain the energy and essentially, the life out of us if we allow them.  They rarely choose to have lives of their own so unbeknownst to us they latch on like a tick, slowly sucking away at our goals and dreams.  This is the person that always has something negative to say when you try and celebrate an achievement, “I would have such and such differently,” they often whisper behind your backs.  I once read a profound quote that altered the way I see people whom I have in my semi-circle, “Pay close attention to the people who don’t clap when you win?”.      

    The Now and Laters, these are those people that you can never depend on, they have a very inconsistent position in our lives. Here today, gone tomorrow.  When we get together, it’s like “ole times”, we discuss how much we missed the fun and conversations that we once shared and vowed to do better in rekindling the bond. It never happens.  This person is not necessarily a bad person, they could be well-intended, however, you are not a priority in their life.  Govern yourself accordingly. 

    The Jolly Ranchers, we all need at least one of these in our tribe, they have an innate ability to see the silver-lining in every dark cloud.  When we complain that we are “not good enough”, they challenge us to see that we are “beyond good enough”.  They are our reliable and faithful cheering squad.  When I think of this type person it reminds me of Tiffany Haddish’s role on last year’s box office hit, Girls Trip.  There is never a dull moment when this type person is around you and they always seem to be the life of the party. This is also the person who is always there for others, lending a hand, showing support, however very rarely receiving the appreciation in return, protect them.

    The Snickers, this is that delightful person that comes into our lives with a hidden agenda. On the surface, this person appears to be on our side, in the canoe with you, rowing in the same direction, however, as soon as your back is turned, they’re poking holes in your canoe while rowing backward, trying to through your flow off.  Truth be told, this person secretly wants to be you.  They stand by your side when you “win” but lurk in your shadows snickering with others at your downfalls and disappointments. This is the fake friend, beware.

    The Life-Savers, alas, our BFF, our ride or die, our partner in crime.   This is the person in your life who knows you better than you know yourself, they can read your mind and finish your sentences.  They are your chief line of defense and have probably interceded on your behalf a time or two.  They are 1000% for you.  Even when you two argue, you give each other space and reunite as if nothing ever happened.  This is the person who isn’t afraid to tell you to “Go take that off!” in order to prevent you from leaving the house looking a hot mess, they want you to shine and you proudly share your light with them.  Your Life-Saver will accept your shortcomings, won’t judge your flaws, and you can speak to them about anything because you faithfully hold each other’s deepest secrets.  If in your lifetime you experience the love and support of one or two Life-Savers, you are indeed a blessed person, cherish them.